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Caged Autistic story involving me yesterday


Vigiles Urbani
For a few weeks now, I've been lying to my family that I've been working as a security guard. The twist is that I quit before my first shift was even scheduled. And I couldn't bring myself to tell my family because I'm sick of them pestering me about work and this lie has kept them quiet.

Well yesterday my day wasn't going to end without a surprise. My Grandma texted me saying how she wanted a pic of me in my uniform.

Oh shit.

I began to panic, for grandmother has provided me with plenty of cash for larping as a good christian boy, and a good christian boy doesn't lie to his grandmama.

All these ideas were flying through my head. I tried to Photoshop a security outfit onto a pic of myself but it looked too obvious. I debated if I should just tell everyone it was all a lie, but it would bring hell on Earth and my family would never trust me again.

Suddenly an idea popped into my head. I'll go to walmart and buy a fake security outfit and snap a pic of me wearing it at home.

And so, for the price of a videogame I bought an outfit that closely resembled what security guards wear. Took a selfie and sent it to that bitch, I mean, my wonderful grandma and she called me handsome (lies). And my secret remains safe... for now.

Hopefully she doesn't find this post.
Tell her you do undercover, go to a party city or order a cheap vest.

Whenever you find yourself in a situation like this don't respond until you have the uniform